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annesue
22 December 2009 @ 10:04 pm
it's moments like this, when even listening to worship is difficult.
when everything doesn't seem to be right even when nothing is really going wrong.
when suddenly seems like you are truly alone.
when you have no expectations because expectations will cause disappointment.
when you want to cry because you think it'll make you feel better even though there's no real reason to be crying or sad.
when really, all you want to do is curl into a ball because you know a new year, isn't really all that special.
when your heart is breaking even though there's no reason for it to.
when you know that really you're all alone, because really, there's no real problem.

what are you supposed to do?
what is there left to do.
what can i do.
 
 
annesue
17 August 2009 @ 12:14 pm
Each time I turn around
There's nothing there at all
So tell me why I feel like
I'm up against a wall

But maybe it's a false alarm
And every answer sounds the same
Just colours bleeding into one that hasn't got a name
Maybe I can't see
Maybe it's just me

I'm trying to put this thing to bed
I drugged it in it's sleep
Remember what you said.
Are you comfortable to keep it?
Keep it?

i don't believe that it's a coincidence.
make this feeling go away.
please.
 
 
Current Mood: pensive
Current Music: kt tunstall
 
 
annesue
30 March 2009 @ 10:08 pm
Of all the things I've believed in
I just want to get it over with
Tears form behind my eyes
But I do not cry
Counting the days that pass me by

I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
It feels like I'm starting all over again

The last three years were just pretend
And I said,

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to


I still get lost in your eyes
And it seems that I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light
But it's not right


Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time
I want what's yours and I want what's mine
I want you
But I'm not giving in this time


Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

And when the stars fall
I will lie awake
You're my shooting star
Tags:
 
 
Current Mood: sad
Current Music: michelle branch
 
 
annesue
15 November 2008 @ 12:01 am
If the elephants have past lives yet all destined to always remember
It's no wonder how they scream
Like you and I they must have some temper

And I am dreaming of them on the planes
Dirtying up their beds
Watching for some sign of rain to cool their hot heads

And how dare that you send me that card when I am doing all that I can do
You are forcing me to remember when all I want is to just forget you

If the tiger shall protect her young then tell me how did you slip by
All my instincts have failed me for once
I must have somehow slept the whole night

And I am dreaming of them with their kill
Tearing it all apart
Blood dripping from their lips and teeth sinking into heart

And how dare that you say you'll call
When you know I need some peace of mind
If you have to take sides with the animals
Won't you do it with one who is kind

And if the hawks in the trees need the dead
If you're living you don't stand a chance
For a time though you share the same bed
There are only two ends to this dance

You can flee with your wounds just in time or lie there as he feeds
Watching yourself ripped to shreds and laughing as you bleed

So for those of you falling in love keep it kind
Keep it good
Keep it right
Throw yourself in the midst of danger but keep one eye open at night
 
 
Current Mood: distressed
 
 
annesue
03 August 2007 @ 12:50 am
oh dear. holy cow.

it's been 2 months, and i still have not updated. hahaha.. sorryy...

been procrastinating too much. :p

i'll get around to it riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight away. : )
 
 
Current Location: mahh roooooem
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: coldplay - yellow
 
 
annesue
10 April 2007 @ 04:20 pm
i finished my english draft.

i'm now staying back in the web to finish up my accounts for MYOB.

i don't know whether to be happy or sad. seriously

i need water. like badly.

i think my breath stinks like shit.

i didn't bring my bottle of water because i brought my "machine" today.

dear gawd i'm whining.

KILL ME. PLEASE.

ttfn.
 
 
Current Location: the web
Current Mood: cranky
Current Music: lifehouse - quasimodo
 
 
annesue
10 April 2007 @ 12:34 pm
i think i'm pretty screwed.

and i can offically be called queen of last min homework.

DEAR GAWD!
this was supposed to stop the last time i was freaking late in handing up my english draft.
i'm sitting in starbucks, supposed to be finishing up my english draft,
but instead, i'm sitting in starbucks avoiding my freaking english draft like a plague and blogging instead.

fuck i'm screwed.
royally screwed.

die die die.

*deep breaths*

i can do this!!

*no i can't*

goobye.
 
 
Current Location: starbucks
Current Mood: lazy
Current Music: some jazzy song playing now.
 
 
annesue
08 April 2007 @ 11:15 pm
Wish You Were Here

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

And did they get you trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees? Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change? And did you exchange
a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl,
year after year,
running over the same old ground. What have we found?
The same old fears,
wish you were here.
 
 
Current Mood: content
Current Music: return to me - matthew ryan
 
 
annesue
05 April 2007 @ 12:30 am
i know that this is just ONE friend that's leaving, and in my opinion, i guess in some ways that's worse..

he could still be with us in LAN and english, but because of one freaking dumb government rule, he has to leave us.
unlike graduation, when almost everyone leaves (unless they're staying for 3rd sem), it's easier to accept in a way.

college will be different without Julius, but life still goes on.

i hate the fact that things still go on when something like this happens, but hey.. that's life isn't it..

the first person to leave was Teh, then Zhen Ting, then Sunil and Jocelyn. these people left before SPM.
after that was Alwi, Derek, then Joanne. next Li Qing will be gone too..

ironically, the day alwi got back from holland, was the day joanne left..
_________________________________________________

julius leaving is a wake up call to me.

i'm finally remembering that college IS only one year.

after one year, we'll be saying more goodbyes, and it'll be the last day of high school all over again..
__________________________________________________

but for all said and done, this post is for julius.
take care of yourself julius.
make sure you come back to visit us.
 
 
Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: kenangan terindah - samson
 
 
annesue
31 March 2007 @ 09:49 pm
i have discovered something really weird today.

get this shit.

i get depressed whenever i drink coffee.


yes. coffee.

my emergency "fuel" for almost-all-nighters.

/headdesk.

why is my life so freaking fucked up?
 
 
Current Location: in front of my laptop
Current Mood: depressed
Current Music: jesse mccartney - just so you know
 
 
annesue
30 March 2007 @ 12:12 pm

geez..
i stayed up late last night finishing up my business presentation. i finished at 5+.
ok fine, it was partly my fault since i shouldn't have been reading at the same time.. 
but on the other hand, it was the last chapter of the 4th book.. so i kinda had to finish reading it..

but anyways, i got up at 6.30, did my stuff and went down..
i looked at the food and my stomach got queasy. it's not a good feeling. seriously

i finished my business presentation instead of my econs summary first, because ib is my first period, and i had volunteered to finish the presentation.. and i was so damn proud of it too! colourful and i edited some pics so that it would make the presentation look really pretty.

well anyways, slept in the bus and woke up refreshed!
went for class, and then found out that one of my group members didn't turn up.

yeap.
fuck right?

right now i'm trying to finish up my econs summary, and i hope i manage to finish it in time..
i'm skipping english today to go for 6th period econs.

somehow i prefer that class, and it's definately not the fact that it's an all guys class..
it's nosier and easier for discussion and talks instead of it being really quiet in period 3 econs.

gonna try to finish up my summary now. breaks gonna be over in 45 mins, and i basically have another 30mins after that to skip LAN.

HURRY HURRY HURRY!
i can do this. :)

 
 
Current Location: in the web
Current Mood: cranky
Current Music: you belong to me
 
 
annesue
26 March 2007 @ 09:55 pm

so! time for an update! xD
telling people to update update but me myself nvr update..

tsk tsk..

so anyways!

Saturday was Leon's birthday, and 6 of us, Leon, Yee Keong, QiHan, Terence, Wendy and myself went to Sunway to celebrate.. yes, our group actually has more people then that, but they couldn't make it. D:

anyways, sunway sunway! i went with my parents, and they were going to eat at the chinese restaurant in sunway hotel, so i went to the meeting spot and terence was there, went to get some stuff, and the walked back to the meeting spot, and leon and wendy were there! yay! lol.. really la, qihan's brain lagging one hour behind.. said 1pm, he really reached there at 2pm.

quite funny la really.. anyways! we went to buy movie tickets, (300, if you're wondering.. ;) ) and we went to eat at sushi king. wendy got a fish bone stuck in her throat and we were getting her to eat all sorts of things to get the fish bone down.

me : eat/drink something warm/hot
terence : eat more rice
yee keong : EAT BANANA!

ROFL. it was funny. then after that, we walked around, and when we had nothing to do, we suggested bowling but there was some tourney going on, so then we went to the snooker center.

the guys played pool, and me and wendy occasionally took some shots. lol.
after that, watched the movie, where in only me and wendy were laughing by ourselves in the cinema, and i had to gogogo home.

we didn't camwhore that day! surprising right.. i know, i'm pretty stunned too! ; )

anyways, the point of this entry is to wish leon, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! :DDD

 
 
Current Location: chair in my room
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: coldplay - trouble
 
 
annesue
12 March 2007 @ 11:35 pm

today i had my ABRSM piano theory paper at SMKDU, and by i finished my paper, and when i was out of the classroom and went out to wait for my dad, the students of SMKDU had already gotten their results..

my theory paper ended at 12pm, so by the time my dad came to pick me up, which was about  12.15pm, i was already half numb with fear. i was freaking scared but i was numb to even realise my fear i guess..

i called syira, and she was like, "Dude, where are you? everyone left already!"
i was like, "SHIT! what did you get? how did you do?"
"8 a's. i got a1 for tasawur."
"hahahahahhahahaa.. that's damn good laa"

for those that didn't know, we (me, syira and shaz) had this brilliant idea to take the tasawur paper for SPM. the damned subject was easy i can't deny, but we didn't study, so me and shaz were like, ah fuck this, cannot la.. have to study for the science paper.. so only syira was in the exam hall during the paper.. hahahaha..

i myself got 7a's, and 2 b3's.

A1 : english (both markings), math, gen. science, history (i know right! like WTF?!), accounts and econs.
B3 : literature in english and bm. (as expected i guess)
TH : tasawur islam.

HAHAHA.
so yea. those are my results, and in my family, i am the current record holder for most a's for spm.. i guess it'll be broken in 2 years time. also known as wei's year.

i'm actually pretty pleased with my results if anyone is wondering.. i'm just glad i didn't do as badly as i predicted myself to do!

p/s. I SO HAVE TO FREAKING WATCH 300 AGAIN. it is so bloody good.

I NEED A FRIEND TO GO WITHHH! who wants to go with me? :D

 
 
Current Location: my room, as usual
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: disagree - suicide note
 
 
annesue
02 March 2007 @ 11:09 pm

"on these hands and knees i'm crawling,
all i reach for you...
i'm terrified of these four walls
these iron bars can't hold my soul
and all i need is you"

things still aren't complicated, which is a realllly good thing..
i have a slight crush on someone.
but it's nothing.
i hope..

it's been on for a while.
EEEE.
GERAMNYA.

why the fuck do i always fall for the wrong type of guys?!
*headsmash*

kill me now please..

 
 
Current Location: my room
Current Mood: gloomy
Current Music: lifehouse - simon
 
 
annesue
28 February 2007 @ 11:13 pm
yay!  
so today was eilin's birthday!

we all didn't know what to do, so we bought her cake from secret recipe, chocolate indulgance because there was no tiramisu and it's a good thing since most of them didn't like tiramisu, and me, leon and elicia came out of LAN class early, walked to secret recipe, waited for eilin, wendy, stephanie and qihan to bring her back to college, then we walked back to college and hid in class and took the cake in class.

we had an idea to bring the cake with the candles fully lighted and sing happy birthday to eilin, unfortunately, the wind was feeling evil that time, and didn't let all the candles be lighted. i bought a lighter to light the candles, and then julius took it coz he wanted it. lol.

chinese new year was fun!

i basically stayed home and did nothing much... i did do some stuffs, not much, but yea..

i'm supposed to be finishing my english, so that i shall go do.

bye bye.

p.s : got the new laptop! :D
pp.s : it's very cold right now..
 
 
annesue
14 February 2007 @ 10:14 pm

my head hurts. i think i'll be in this cycle where i won't be getting enough sleep or something. 
fuck. my english assignment is due on friday, and i haven't even started.

last night i slept at 1+am due to my own stupidity. i really relaly really don't want to sleep late again tonight, but i guess i don't relaly have a choice. D:

this sucks. but on a lighter note, i know i have made some really good friends.
: )

i'm not just talking about college, but overall in life..
i guess being depressed and emo does make everything seem like shit.

xoxoxoxo to all of you. ; )

 
 
Current Mood: cranky
 
 
annesue
09 February 2007 @ 10:47 pm
Please don't do what I say
'Cause if you don't love me, it's worthless anyway
Please don't trouble yourself
You'll only go away in the end

Please don't follow my commands
'Cause what's the point in that
I keep hoping that all of your plans
Will fall through the roof

Like two ships passing in the night, we're gone
Only the moon and the stars in the sky did know
To cry for me
As I sailed on

Please don't trouble yourself
I only want your love
You keep giving me your help
Please stop playing along
You know you're wasting your energy
And you're breaking my heart

Like two ships passing in the night, we're gone
Only the moon and the stars in the sky did know
To cry for me
As I sailed on

I can just see it now
You're reckless and in love
Your heart's boiling over
Oh, I can just see it now
You're coming around

Like two ships passing in the night, we're gone
Only the moon and the stars in the sky did know
To cry for me
As I sailed on

Sailed on
Sailed on
 
 
Current Mood: depressed
 
 
annesue
09 February 2007 @ 08:30 am
i'm fucked. seriously. this is seriously the first and last time in my life that i'll ever do such last minute work ever again.

i swear.

i stayed up until 4+am last night talking on the phone with syira. before i called her, i tried to start my project but my brain seriously wasn't working. it just wasn't working at all. i couldn't get a single thing done. also, it didn't help that i was pretty lazy to start anything.

anyways. i'm dead. this assignment has a weight of 4, and now i'm blogging? AH FUCK. i skipped my normal business period to finish up my project, and i think that i needa skip lunch too, coz i needa go to the web and get some coloured stuffs printed.

i'm going to fail fail fail fail. byebye. 
 
 
Current Mood: scared
 
 
annesue
08 February 2007 @ 03:21 pm

babe, you were supposed to call me right??
you suck.

anyways, i'm in college right now. i'm updating in college.
i have to finish up a business assignment today because it's due tomorrow.
i am so screwed (since i'm not allowed to say "fucked" right?) ;)))

gar. how how how. i don't think i'm going to be sleeping tonight.
this is really bad. i doonnno howwwwww.

JOANNNNE! why didn't you calllll.. >:(

say wanna call then didn't call.. 

OMG. i think my short-term memory loss thingymajig is contagious.
this sucks big time. >:(
even the said my memory sucks.
all my friends say my memory sucks!
why leh? D:

i gtg now. nyeh.

 
 
Current Mood: crushed
 
 
annesue
06 February 2007 @ 10:52 pm
teh is back from ozzie land! yayness.. it's been a while since i've gone out with him (not that i used too anyways), and talked with him.

it's so different nowadays.. it's like, i only miss talking to him coz he wasn't here? iono.. but it's fun to talk to him now.

he called me when i was in college today, and after college, we met up and started walking and talking. as usual la right? hahaha..

ended up walking around the park twice, and we walked to centrepoint to get some drinks at starbucks.

college is weird now. on toppa that, iono.. apparently my zodiac this year is going to be in for more friend friend drama.. i'm not going to say, "but what's the worse that could happen?" because that would be stupid, but i'm really tempted too.. i think i needa find something to do with my time. hahaha..

anyways, accounts project now. byebye!
 
 
 
 

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